Disciplines of a Godly Man - Kent Hughes

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Chapter 3: Discipline of Marriage

I'm reminded what the true meaning of marriage is and what a marriage actually entails. Hughes goes through what it looks like to be the man in a marriage and mainly how that love is one that is modelled after how Jesus loved the Church (Eph 5). Christlike love is one that comes from the willingness and conviction to live under the authority of God's directives regarding how we, as men, are called to love our wives.

We are called to a sacrificial love, and more specifically a love with a willingness to sacrifice, even unto death. I'm reminded that marital love claims everything, and involves not only giving all that you have, but also all that you are. Hughes reminds me that even within a marriage there will be many ups and downs that Jesus just die for us, but he also suffered. We are also called to consistently pray for our wives. Do I pray consistently and purposefully for Jess? Do I have a list of her needs, spoken and unspoken, which I passionately hold up before God?

We are also called to show a sanctifying love. I'm reminded that before God, I am called to "present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any blemish, but holy and blameless" (Eph 5:26-27). I'm reminded that this is what it will be like when I am married to Christ - it is the same washed and regenerated Church. I'm reminded that it is actually my responsibility to seek my wife's sanctification. Marriage will reveal everything - and especially loving your spouse is not to love her as a saint, but as a sinner.

Commitment is also something I'm reminded of. That a true marriage isn't based on just the fact that we 'feel' like we love each other. No, Godly marriage is a covenant plus commitment. Marriages that depend on being 'in love' will fall apart. Despite this sounding bad, this is actually a blessing and a great opportunity to show and exemplify Christ's love in a marriage.

Chapter 5: Discipline of Friendship
Friendship is something all men struggle with.

Prayer - friendship is something I struggle with but not something I pray about. If it matters to me, the best place for me to begin is with prayer. I'm reminded that God loves to answer these prayers for his people.

Friendliness - if I want lasting and loyal friends than I need to be friendly to others. Take the initiative to ask questions and to engage with other brothers.

Work

Affirmation

Listening

Acceptance

Hospitality

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